You’re so Vain, you probably think this post is about you.

There seems to be many who find the posts we make to contain attacks on specific people. This post is for them.

If the shoe fits. Wear it.

The most WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR!

HI!

The dampness in the air is either the incoming winter storm
Or the “dewy” anticipation of the upcoming LIBERTY LAKE HOLIDAY BALL!

We think all of the fancy people will be braving the artic like conditions in their oh so Sexy Porsches’ and be heading to the Davenport Hotel. The bidding will be hot and heavy in an attempt for those have nots and the not so fancy people to show themselves to be regarded as a peer to the truely FANCY FOLKS!

Oh yes, rooms will be rented and private parties will be throw to as a prefunction to the actual events.. Oh you did not get an invite to a prefunction private party?? Then you ain’t on of the fancy folks. Sorry your an outsider. Just like highschool, the cliques will be in their finest form this weekend and all through the Hoildays.

Enjoy the season of giving and gossiping.

See you ALL AT BALL!

Muah!

One knob in search of a skilled and willing polisher.

Recently the Liberty Lake Splash ran an article detailing the Liberty Lake Police departments efforts to keep a lid on the increasing frequency of Gentlemen meeting to engage in sex acts in our area.

It seems that some of the more secluded and not so secluded spots of our little slice of Paradise are becoming a popular destination for area gentlemen to meet with other like minded men to engage in Homosexual sex acts. Like a lonely traveler who practices the art of foot tapping in the bathrooms of the Minneapolis airport mensroom, it appears that there are more and more men not having their needs met at home by the little lady.

Now why should we assume these men are married? Are we jumping to conclusions? We think not. Would a single man in search of enjoying the rod and staff of another gentleman, risk meeting and carrying out these acts in a public setting? Some might “get off” on that. We think most would would rather enjoy these adventures at home. Now what if the gentlemens home was also home to his WIFE, Children and the family dog? This gentleman would now find himself between a rock and a hard place. The poor guy has needs, and he needs to have them met. He works long hours for the kids to have the latest and greatest, provide his wife with jewerly, spa trips and the boat for the lake, and let’s not forget having to pay the lease on his new Porsche too. So after a long day of work, and cold nights at home, “Neil”decides he needs to find “Bob”.

So because he is not being service at home by his loving wife, Neil meets Bob, and they spend a few minutes admiring one anothers assets in the parking lot of the park, trail head (no pun intended) or school yard. Now that their needs have been met, they return home to the family and continue living the dream.

So a word of warning to the fine ladies who enjoy reading our blog; take care of your man. If you are not who has been? When that wonderful husband of yours is going out for that run, ride or to take a trip to home depot or the liquior store, think twice, heck offer to ride along, he may have other items on that list of his. Just imagine the dieases YOU are being exposed to by your sexy man.

Don’t think this is true, call 1-800 mrs- mcgreevey.

Let us know your thoughts, and thank you to the Liberty Lake Police department, and the Liberty Lake Splash for your efforts in stamping out this dangerous and disgusting behaviour taking place in our little slice of paradise.

Paradise is more tainted than many want to believe.

Dear Happy Resident/Kind Critic,

We want to share the thoughts and comments recently sent to us by one of our most loyal readers. To those not in the loop, Kind Critic and Happy Resident, are one and the same.
We recently received this comment from them:

HR/KC Says: 

August 20, 2008 at 12:37 pm e

Opinion and unfound harsh accusation are two completely different things.
You use such harsh language when talking about the mermaids. This language is aimed at them most of the time and not on this “fancy” audience you are so obsessed with. You really only add the reference to the audience at the very end… to maybe make these angry comments “okay.”
I really just do not understand.
Plus, they have readers outside of Liberty Lake in some neighborhoods that maybe you wouldn’t consider fancy. I think every woman has every right to feel fancy every once and awhile, to get away. The newsletter is fun. It is not a philosophical piece, more a light pick me up.
I only wish that we could sit down and have an actual conversation about this.

We do this in hopes that Happy Resident aka Kind Critic will help us in having an open conversation about our goals and purposes for this blog.

Dear HR/KC,

We are grateful for your contribution. We would like to help you have a better understanding of what we are doing. We are open to an exchange of ideas, opinion and information. That being said we take issue with your most recent comments and ask for clarification if you don’t mind.

Regarding the statement, “You use such harsh language when talking about the mermaids. This language is aimed at them most of the time and not on this “fancy” audience you are so obsessed with.”  Would you kindly point out these occurrences to us? We have ridiculed the Ideals, and values being promulgated by their Lifestyle publication, we have not attacked them. On the other hand we have been labeled by some as-a lonely old screw, depressed, angry, hateful and even a high school cheerleading reject. We assume many of these very personal attacks have come directly from those who embrace the ideals we are calling into question. We have singled out no individual to accuse or speak of harshly. If we are wrong please point this out to us. 

Regarding this statement, ‘You really only add the reference to the audience at the very end… to maybe make these angry comments “okay.” I really just do not understand.” We are unsure of what it is you are pointing too. Is it our style of writing? We intend to be rather tongue in cheek even sarcastic in our approach and style.

Finally regarding this,  “Plus, they have readers outside of Liberty Lake in some neighborhoods that maybe you wouldn’t consider fancy. I think every woman has every right to feel fancy every once and awhile, to get away. The newsletter is fun. It is not a philosophical piece, more a light pick me up.”  We have stated that they have found a clear niche in for their publication. Those whom this offering is targeted are not exclusive to Liberty Lake. We recognize that many women across this great country enjoy the tips, essays, insights and ideas presented in the Mermaids publication. We use the term “fancy” as a blanket targeted at a group rather than any one individual. We agree that all women should feel the freedom to feel fancy as often as possible. We are not taking that freedom from anyone. Have pointed out that you can feel fancy without having a man with a Porsche. While we have made generalizations about the readership of the mermaids, we have never attacked them as women, as people or as residents.

We look forward to hearing your thoughts.

Thanks again for the interest.-TP

GREAT NEWS! We’re Baaaaaaccck!

Hi Liberty Lakers!

After a brief “sabatical”, (nothing to do with that misunderstanding we had with law enforcement at the WAR concert) We. Are. BACK!

Yes good news is infact, good news. We will resume our regular reporting you have come to enjoy so much.

So watch this space for our reports and commentary.

We love you our readers and thank you so much for all the support.

Let’s get serious for a moment.

Dust off the cowbell and clean the tie-dye. WAR is coming to the park on Saturday at 7:00pm. Should be a good time. Come out And visit. Maybe we can get the MERMAIDS OF THE LAKE to join us as we sing and dance to “why can’t we be friends?”

We offer a tip of our hats to the FRIENDS OF PAVILLION PARK. Seriously.

Let’s all thank L. Martin and ALL OF ALPINE SHORES!

The opinion letter submitted to the Liberty Lake Splash recently by L. Martin of Alpine shores has hit us hard. Like a potato salad gone bad or reading the latest “lifestyle” piece from the MOL, the result was stomach turning.

But despite this we want to salute the kind and generous families from Alpine Shores for letting the “lowly” city dwellers, enjoy “your parade” and watch “your fireworks.” THANK YOU THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

How very kind of you and yours to let the unwashed masses desend upon your little slice of paradise. Afterall we have a parade equal to the Macy’s Parade and the Rose Parade all started bY you! What a gift!

As for the fireworks show. That too has ALWAYS been for the enjoyment of the dwellers on “their lake” to enjoy. We are all SO thankful that you allow us, the “non-lake dwellers” to donate to and view, your fireworks display! Again we are unworthy but grateful for your generous benevolence to us all.
Please consider These poor families of “the lake” have already lost so much because of us in the “city” and all the development “we” gave brought down upon these generous and upstanding folks.

The horrors of Development have caused them to have stolen from their tender hands the clean air, low traffic, and………..brace yourselves……………the …….annual……..YARD SALE! (gasp) (shudder) (cower)…..

Yes the annual LIBERTY LAKE YARD SALE has been ripped from the hands of the founding members by all of us in the “city.”

We did not realize that the alpine shores area was verbotten from participation in the LIBERTY LAKE YARD SALE. From the call to arms issued by L. Martin, it seems as the fireworks and parade will be their Alamo.

What a crock! No one is trying to take anything away. Only trying to make things better for ALL of us.

Getting a head of ourselves

One nice thing about Liberty Lake is the abundance of playgrounds and small parks scattered through-out the neighborhoods. They provide us all a wonderful place for children to play, friends to meet, and picnics to enjoy.

Is it news worthy or of interest to report if a resident of our city chooses one of these playgrounds/parks as the place to suck on the business end of a shotgun. Resulting in the scattering of the contents of their head through out the park and playground?

We have been told that just such an incident occured earlier this year in one of the parks/playgrounds you and yours could possibly frequent. Would you want to know? Let us in on your thoughts.

“Time for you to GTFO.”

We have been so nicely requested to GET THE FRIENDS OVER….we think..? It would really be unfortunate if someone want’s us to GET THE F@#K OUT, simply because we have decided to post our thoughts and observations.
Maybe they want us to GATHER TULIPS FROM OUTSIDE, GET THE FORKS OUT, GO TO FIND OUT… Anyway, Seattle native said it was time for us to GTFO.

If any of you know what they Ment by this abbreviation, please let us know. Saddly, Seattle Native won’t respond to our questions. Anywho, seems like someone is a wee bit TOO SERIOUS.

a public declaration.

Let it be known to all who read this that our health is top notch, see our physician for the evidence of this. We do not use drugs, or have we ever abused drugs. We are excellent swimmers, exceptional drivers who regularly maintain our vehicles. We are happy, and have at no time in our lives considered suicide in any form. We have no history of clumsiness or risky behavior.
We also have a family history of relatives living a healthy, active and happy life well into their 90’s.

We post this so that in the event of any of us meeting an unusual demise, we request that there be a through investigation.
Enjoy the sunshine, we are!